Traditionally, self-esteem is understood as our evaluation of ourselves, and can be positive or negative. How can we assess ourselves? There is only one system of evaluation, which is to compare ourselves to others. If we lived alone on this planet or on a deserted island, we would definitely not face the question of self-esteem, because there would be no one to compare ourselves to. The biggest danger affecting our personal brand lies in the fact that we evaluate ourselves in comparison to other people and their achievements.
Self-esteem and external factors
If we understand self-esteem as self-assessment compared to other people, it means that self-esteem is dependent and can vary based on external factors. Any unfriendly or detrimental behavior towards us from another person or a crowd, any remark, recognition, animosity, acceptance or rejection, will affect our self-esteem. And it often wavers from the smallest external glitch. Then after the negative experience, the person says: “My self-esteem has dropped.” I think you’ll agree that these fluctuations in our self-esteem definitely don’t enhance our personal power.
The concept of self-esteem
And now let’s look at the concept of self-esteem from the position of spiritual intelligence, or the “true self”. It’s enough to look at it from a slightly different angle, and “self-esteem as self-assessment” becomes “self-esteem – perception of self-worth or self-appreciation”, dependent not on external, but on internal circumstances. Did you feel the change and the difference? Self-assessment in relation to other people becomes the perception of the value of your own true self – the acknowledgement that you are valuable. This means that we no longer need to assess ourselves in comparison to other people and their achievements. This means that we just need to accept our true selves, perceiving our authenticity and its value. In this case, self-esteem is the perception of the value of our own authenticity, when we acknowledge that we are valuable the way we are. If we compare ourselves to even one person, we have already lost. We go from being a player in life to a victim.
But! Perception of your value has one condition – in exactly the same way, you have to acknowledge other people’s authenticity and perceive and accept the value of others.
Find out more in the SQ based personal branding course “The concept of Authenticity”.
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